It’s Monday, September 7th at midnight and I am overwhelmed.
A week ago I was sitting on the couch watching Bachelor in Paradise, iced lemon water in hand, not a care in the world. Today I am sitting on the futon of a girl’s apartment, whom I met today, unable to sleep because of the million thoughts racing through my mind.
I just finished my first day (more like half day) of peer adviser training (training to prepare me to help guide a group of freshman through our Wildcat Welcome aka orientation and their first year). It was exciting to be surrounded by some of my absolute favorite people here at Northwestern. However, the AC was broken and it felt more like a hot yoga class than anything. It was long, we got our schedules and all sorts of other info thrown at us. Yepp, you could say that was overwhelming.
But that is not what’s getting to me the most. I’m nervous. What if I’m not a good enough PA? What if I can’t answer their questions? What if they don’t like me? What if something goes wrong? What if, what if, what if.
Now, I’m not writing this just to hear the opposite. I’m not fishing for the “oh, please. Renee, you’ll be fine.” No. I promised real and real is what you’re getting. Sorry (not actually sorry).
So now I have to remind myself of what I told one of my new students. He was writing to me, worried about the huge transition ahead of him, a transition that I personally loved (one of the reasons why I wanted to become a PA). This is an adventure. Whether I mess up or I’m awkward at first, I’m doing something new. Being a leader isn’t exactly what I would classify as “in my zone of comfort.” But hey, I love adventures and this is one.
New students get ready, because you are about to embark on the adventure of a lifetime, and I am right there with you. #letsdothis
^^^^ my motto for this week + next (:
confetti kindness 
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